I’m Going Crazy
I am not going crazy. I just know that people have a weird fetish to read, watch, and listen to people having hard times. I wonder what that says about them. Let me look in my psychology book…J
I had a sudden influx of traffic due to my post on Monday. It is funny to think that people latched on to one of my more depressing posts. It made me wonder, do people like to see me miserable. Or do people just love and identify with misery in general? Was the post from Monday a reflection of the times in the free world? Who knows? It just made me wonder. I wonder if I use four and five letter words more often would I be the “Blog King?” J would that be more suiting? I don’t want to find out. I will leave it to the next person to try.
I will say this though, I wrote that to show people I am still human. Even though I have more energy, optimism, faith and ambition, than anyone you can imagine, I still get irritated at times. This is still prison. I do think that people gravitate and constantly tune into me because I am their best and worst thoughts and action. From the outside looking in, up to the point of prison, I was and still am an interesting and entertaining story to watch play out. I am guaranteed to push it to the limit every time. Good or bad, something significant, classical, and historical is bound to happen when I am around. Guaranteed.
I share these thoughts with everyone for the purpose of letting others watch my evolution. This is real life. I have no cameras, producers, writers, or sponsors to try to please on this reality show. This is “Daddy the Explorer.” J If I get out of here and become successful people will say that making these posts is one of the greatest things I ever did. They will take some of my comments off of this site and quote me like one of the greats. J They’ll invite me back to the special dinners, schools, and exclusive clubhouses that they stopped inviting me to when things went sour. They will want to take pictures and tell me how they always believed in me, even when I was at my lowest. Shallow people are so predictable.
On the flip side of the coin, if I get out and become a failure (NOT LIKELY TO HAPPEN), then people will say that this was nonsense and everyone were idiots for tuning in daily. They will use this as an example of great con. I won’t receive my invite to the special dinners, schools, or clubhouses. L I won’t take any pictures and the shallow people of the word will celebrate my demise. They’ll tell me that they threw my jersey away and they can’t watch the 2002 National Championship game because I am in it. Then they’ll tell me how I ran a slow 40 yard dash, got cut from Denver, and how stupid I was for leaving school early, and catching two criminal cases. Guaranteed. I am so above it all. Pay attention and learn something. Apply whatever it is you learn to your daily actions consistently and live free. The only thing that will bother me is a new indictment. I am out— back to business as usual.