Forgive and Move On
Ha ha. Let’s reflect back to when I was first locked down. I’m laughing because I remember when I would get mad that none of my old friends reached out to see how I was doing. I would sit in the cell wasting time thinking about their lack of communication. I think I spent my first four months being bitter about the shape of my life. I would sit in silence, staring at the walls dreaming of better days but I had no idea of how they would come. I’m not sure that I even had the mental ability to see into the next week. Incarceration was and still is real. Incarceration initially takes you for a psychological ride.
Before prison I don’t think I could have named you five books out of the Bible or library. The thought is embarrassing in a funny way. Doesn’t that sound unbelievable, twenty-two with no real knowledge of any religious or spiritual material? It is hard to believe that I neglected my spirit for so long. Most of my prayers in the past were to be healthy during athletic competitions or safe in the city streets of wherever I lived. That was the extent of it all.
It is good that I’ve separated from my old habits. I want to tell my old friends that I forgive them. I pray that peace be with them throughout their daily movements. I want to express to them that I understand that most of them have never been through this so I can understand them for not knowing how much support I could have used both mentally and spiritually throughout this sentence. Respect should always be there for them but it is official that I must move on. I have business to handle. I have a family and a vision. It doesn’t consist of nonsense and nightclubs. I am a father. It is time to move on.
March 16, 2009 at 3:56 pm
maurice I always thought you got railroaded it is crap that you were not allowed to go pro people tried to hold you back for there own benefits they try to make you into some bad guy your not you were not allowed to pursue your career and had got distracted and probobly depressed and hence with all eyes being on you one mistake or so your in jail get through this and I wish you the best I own a restaurant and maybe a business of your own would interest you good luck you are a winner
March 16, 2009 at 4:46 pm
Glad that you found this out in your life! People don’t care about you, they only care about themselves.
March 16, 2009 at 8:25 pm
Hi Maurice,
I am originally from Youngstown, OH. I’ve lived in several cities throughout the US. I’ve followed your career since you played at Austintown Fitch High School. I am so proud of you because you have put your trust in the Lord. Only through Him can you see what purpose He has for you. Your time right now is just God’s way of allowing you to spend quality time with Him. He has a devine purpose for your life and don’t let anyone tell you any different. Once you asked Him for forgiveness, He forgave you. We all fall short of the glory of God. No one is without sin. I will continue to pray for you and your family. Just remember. God has a plan for you a plan to prosper you not to harm you to give you a hope and a future (Jerimiah 29:11). Take care.
Bobbie
March 16, 2009 at 8:26 pm
Feel free to e-mail me anytime.
March 16, 2009 at 9:17 pm
“Oftentimes, there comes a moment in all athletes’ lives where the only thing they have to rely on is their faith in the Word of God. The physical body ages and slows down, and people turn their backs on athletes; but the spirit that is in them grows and gets stronger as the trials and tributlations get harder.” This is an excerpt taken from the book, “Finding Your Way with MAPS: Developing Good Athletes”.
March 16, 2009 at 9:56 pm
When something traumatic happens to a friend the seemingly easier path is to avoid it, but I’ve treated friends like that in the past and I think it will haunt me forever that I wasn’t a good friend when I was needed. As they say “A friend in need is a friend indeed”.
I’m enjoying your writings and wish you well.
March 16, 2009 at 10:17 pm
Where can I write to you Maurice?
March 16, 2009 at 10:34 pm
Maurice,
I saw a small mention of your blog mentioned in the notes of a sports page. You are STILL one of my favorite athletes, not that that would mean much to you right now. I still remember when my issue of ESPN arrived with the “One and Done?” headline. It was awesome. I admit, it’s framed.
Anyway.. I’ve read through a majority of your entries. It was really quite a surreal couple hours. I’m so grateful that you have found this outlet during your incarceration.
I’ve wondered more than a couple times what’s been going on with you since you’ve been out of the spotlight.
Just know that you still have support- whether or not you ever play another down of football.
Please keep up with the blog.. your insight and newfound wisdom (along with doubt, skepticism) on a variety of issues has already had a positive impact on me and I’m sure others as well.
March 16, 2009 at 10:47 pm
Hi Maurice,
Thank you for sharing a part of you through your wonderful writings. This blog will definitely allow others to get to know you for who you are versus what is written about you. Continue to keep your faith in the Lord, as He is the only one that will see you through this. Always remember… what was meant for evil God made it for good. Continue to allow God to guide and direct your steps according to His will and purpose for you. Friends may come and go but God will never leave your side. Stay positive and keep on keeping on with your writings.
March 16, 2009 at 11:57 pm
Hi Maurice, my name is Derek Johnson and I am the Director for Teen Challenge in Reno. We are a boys residential center for at risk youth. I have been reading your blog and have enjoyed it. Maybe in the near future you may desire to help our boys from making the same mistakes we all have. I was into drugs and went thru TC and am now the Director. Our boys need people like us that have been thru the storms and have come out better people.
March 17, 2009 at 12:03 am
Keep your head up Maurice.
March 17, 2009 at 12:24 am
Maurice,
From one young man to another, I would just like to say it has been a pleasure discovering and reading your blog. As someone who is also in the process of deep introspection, it is nice to find a dedicated comrade in the quest for awakening. While many people “out here” seem to be in a state of despair, you have reminded us that “out here” is but an illusion, that it is the mind itself that determines whether someone is a prisoner. In a time when so many people, with seemingly everything in the world, are falling from grace, your words shine a bright light on the possibility of redemption. And redemption is one of humanity’s favorite story lines. Clearly, you were sent to Earth to do work that transcends the superficial expectations of over-zealous college sports’ fans and commentators. I look forward to witnessing your perpetual transformation, and feel honored that you have found the courage to share it with us. It’s the kind of thing we need.
Warm Regards,
Teo
March 17, 2009 at 1:26 am
Lemme start by saying that your writing is great. Secondly I hope that you get things turned around. Now I will say what I came here to say. You were amazing at Ohio State. I wish like hell you had stayed. You could have won the Heisman. I got pretty mad at you for leaving I’m not gonna lie. I thought you were an arrogant self righteous *******. Then I kept seeing your name pop up in the media from time to time and it always seemed to be bad. I got pissed. I would think how can a dude with this much talent just throw it all away. I realize now that people pave there own roads in life and they are the ones have to drive on them. You can make it bumpy or you can make it smooth. Its all up to you. No matter how you pave your road you always reach your destination in the end. I wish you the best man. Good to see your spirits are high and your head is sitting level on your shoulders.
March 17, 2009 at 3:00 am
One of my great friends has gone through some difficult times and through distrust I have nearly disappeared from his life. I don’t think that he is of the mental capacity that you are, in that he has never faced the reality of his actions. I, too, am 22 years old and I always looked up to you. Reading these blogs and seeing that you have developed emotionally is very exciting and I can only hope that you can continue to expand your mind.
I can only wonder how you have the opportunity to write, and publish your writing from incarceration… I feel that a post explaining your ability to write is in order, unless I have missed something.
God Bless you Maurice, you have provided me with much entertainment throughout the years.
March 17, 2009 at 9:36 am
Mo, it was a pleasant surprise to learn of your blog recently. This post is relevant, due to our playing days at WGH. I can see how you could be disappointed about your “friends” not being there when you needed them the most. When you are at you lowest point, is when you find out who your true friends are. Most of the time this is your family, which seems apparent through the support your family has shown providing this blog.
March 17, 2009 at 11:36 am
Best of luck… I been where you are and went through the same feelins. I pray you get out soon and get your mind right. And although there is much more than football to this life we lead, I will never forget watching your Freshman Season at OSU… Best wishes and God Bless.
March 17, 2009 at 11:37 am
Reece,
It’s amazing, sometimes, what it takes for someone to ‘see the light’ so to speak. For you this happened while sitting alone, in the dark, with nothing but the power of your mind to provide light for your soul. Fairweathered friends and niteclubs aren’t going to give you anything greater than hangovers and hands held out. I think you’ll soon realize that ‘forgiving’ those ‘friends’ who’ve forgotten about you is intertwined with the process of ‘moving on.’ Once you’ve been released, those fiends and nightclubs will still be there and, of course, there will always be a time and place to cut loose and do some serious partying, however, you’ve gotta ask yourself is THAT what you WANT to be doing upon your release or are you prepared to move on into the next phase of your life?
Take Care, R
March 18, 2009 at 6:09 pm
Forgiveness is a very powerful and very mature quality, possessed by those able to deal with reality and move forward.We have all made mistakes,some worse than others.We do not all handle things the same way. We must forgive those that do not handle things the right way.We must also accept the fact that we are all different and unique.
March 22, 2009 at 4:35 pm
Maurice Clarett 529-720
2001 E Central AVE
Toledo OH 43608
March 23, 2009 at 8:43 am
Great…